My competition date is almost here… in 4 days. Yes, 4 DAYS! This Saturday I will be sharing the stage with other women around my age who are fit. I almost feel like saying “I DID IT!” but the truth is that I haven’t done it yet… the fitness aspect yes. I’m fit for sure, fitter than I ever imagined and feeling pretty proud of myself. My birthday came and went last week and I was able to hold off on having cake because my birthday gift will be to stand on the stage and feel prepared… that’s my goal.
So how do I feel? Well, I’m excited… it hasn’t quite sunk in yet. There are moments when I think about it and I get butterflies in my belly and there are times when I think about it and think to myself “this part is the easy part” My many months of training have been intense, saying no to cake, frozen yogurt, cookies and many other sweets that I would normally eat has been a bit of a challenge although it has gotten easier. I have learned a new level of focus, and keeping my goal in front of me… I have learned more than anything to NOT QUIT, I have reached a new level of consistency. That was the challenging part… and I’m not saying that walking with 5” heels and posing on the stage won’t be difficult because it will be, but I will just be dealing with the discomfort for a few minutes. The transformation I have gone through is deeper than I ever imagined. Heck, I would have normally quit this training at the first excuse I could find. Not this time… and yes there were many times when I wanted to quit… MANY, so many that I lost track.
But the truth is that I did not want to quit. I wanted to say “I DID THIS!” regardless of how I felt, of what a sacrifice it seemed like to others or the many funny faces I got when I’d turn down sweets or food. Am I proud of myself? Heck you bet I am! Here’s the beauty of it, I now have proof that I can do whatever I put my mind to. This has been the MOST challenging thing I have done as a personal goal… (well besides jumping from a plane but other than the initial shock, followed by butterflies, thoughts of “oh crap!” while your whole life flashes before you and finally followed by a feeling of ecstacy as your parachute opens. I can’t say that it was as hard as this training.) Why? Because I had to constantly fight my own thoughts of “I can’t” and find the support through accountability partners. That, I found was the only way to succeed… there was no other way.
I could say that this training took me five months but the truth is that it really took me a whole year and two months of constant training, of eating clean, of working my butt off. I have had a lifestyle change for sure. I now know how to eat, what to eat and when to eat it, These changes are not temporary, they are permanent. While incorporating more healthy foods into my diet after this is done, I have learned that it’s worth it to have a cheat meal per week and now I know what to do if I ever decide to compete again… which who knows, I may surprise myself and just do it.
Some people try to find reasons to be motivated… those who are inspired don’t find reasons, they just do it…. that’s the secret to success.