I woke up today thinking about one of my favorite aunts who died when I was pregnant with my daughter. My family decided not to tell me about it until after my daughter was born because they were worried that something bad would happen to me if I found out during my pregnancy. Her death was a huge shock for the whole family. My aunt had been diagnosed with diabetes and It didn’t matter that her doctor kept telling her to eat healthier. She still felt the urge to eat the way she was eating, almost like when you tell a cancer patient to stop smoking. There is no question in my mind that she was addicted to food. She went to my cousin’s birthday party and ate cake, ice cream and all the foods that were not allowed. The next day, she went to the doctor not feeling well, her sugar levels had skyrocketed and there was nothing the doctors could do for her. She collapsed and died at the doctor’s office.
I found out through my cousin about her passing. I casually told him when he contacted me after my daughter was born “send my love to your mom.” He replied “she died in May, but she had a good life.” I was shocked, sad and angry at my family for not telling me. It was obvious that they had not planned the secret too well. No one had thought that I may actually be in communication with one of my cousins and find out that way. When I gained weight after giving birth, my biggest fear was that I’d get diabetes too. I was at a higher risk because I had been diagnosed with gestational diabetes. Had I continued on the path I was going, I am 100% certain I’d have diabetes today.
“Nothing fits, I’m fat… I hate this” I’d repeat those phrases constantly to my husband, everyday for a whole year. He was so tired of hearing me complain about the same thing over and over again, that one day he told me “stop complaining and DO something about it.” So with that, I decided it was time to get off my lazy butt. By then, something had shifted in me, I was grateful that I was still healthy and in time to reverse whatever damage I had caused in my body.
I remember how at this particular time, my husband and I had been able to move to a nicer property when a friend talked about P90X. I contacted him asking if it “really” worked and after I purchased P90X, he became my coach. The best thing about it, was that he never charged me a dime for coaching because his services were free to me through Beachbody… boy was I thankful that I now had a “free” coach who would support me because I needed ALL the support possible and trust me… I called him more than several times during the first 30 days. “This P90X thing isn’t working!” he’d say, “be patient and stop using the scale every day.” When my first 30 days rolled around, I had lost 8 inches around my waist. That’s when I knew… “This stuff really works!”
Being grateful about our circumstances really helps shift things and even transform them. This is not magical thinking, seriously. The way I see it is that when we value or treasure something, we take care of it, right? We take care of our homes, our children because they are our treasure… if we were thankful about our health, wouldn’t we do the same? I know I am and I know I do. To be honest with you, this journey has made me a better person, more compassionate towards people who are on the same journey that I am because I KNOW how hard it is and I KNOW how much our mind wants to get in the way of our fitness. That’s why I chose to be a coach, because I’ve been there and I know how it is and to date, I STILL have that mental struggle.
As I end this blog entry, I leave you with the following thought: The secret to success is not a lack of failure, the secret to success is simply the act of not quitting regardless of how many times we fail. Instead of being hard on yourself for every time you fail… be thankful for those failures, because each failure will teach you something new if you let it; and each failure brings you closer to success.
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